


The Times of Our Lives

by CalamityJess



Series: Jessica Shepard [1]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-24
Updated: 2013-03-08
Packaged: 2017-11-22 05:03:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/606109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalamityJess/pseuds/CalamityJess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of stories starring Jessica Jayne Shepard. A Space Kid, a War Hero, and future Saviour of the Galaxy. Probably a collection of one-shots and drabbles more than a chapter by chapter work. Set prior to the events of Insanity Check.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hello Mother

Hannah Shepard stood at the window of the SSV Trepidation with a sense of excitement. Today was the day her daughter was coming “home” on leave. She had waited so long for this day. Raising Jessie hadn’t been easy once Jack had died. They had an intense bond, and Hannah had warned him he was spoiling his “little cowgirl” rotten but he’d only laughed and said “Not my Jessie Jayne! You can’t spoil an outlaw!” with that proud papa smile of his. Hannah couldn’t bring herself to crack down about it though. They both knew this was the only child they’d ever have. Between being dual military parents, and Hannahs difficulties with the pregnancy, Jessica would remain an only child. Doted upon from birth, and a complete Daddy’s girl she had grown into a smart, capable, hard working young woman. Then came the surprise. During a conflict with a Colonel’s daughter, young Jessica had lost her temper. When she pushed the girl away from her to avoid being tackled to the ground, a strange blue aura emerged around her, and the girl was hurled backwards into a wall. One broken arm and an angry Colonel later, Jessie was sent to a private training school to master her biotics and receive her implant. She was 14 at the time, and had excelled at her training. 

When Jessie had returned to her family, she was 16, and had decided to enlist after her 18th birthday They were both so proud of her decision to use her skills this way. It was shortly after her 17th birthday, they got the visit no family wants to get. Alliance officers in their dress blues had come to their quarters to deliver the news that the shuttle carrying Jack Shepard home had crashed due to an explosion. Jessica became withdrawn, moody, rebellious. Nothing Hannah could say would bring her around that first year. It was a chance visit by a family friend that finally seemed to break through. 

Captain David Anderson had come to pay his respects as soon as his covert mission was complete, it had taken a year but Hannah understood. She had been in touch keeping him up to date with the happenings in her life, as was their habit since they had met in basic. Jessie was being her typical belligerent self when he had arrived, much to Hannah’s embarrassment. But David asked to talk to the child privately. Neither Jessie nor Anderson had ever told her what they spoke about, but Jessie came out of that room and hugged her mother for the first time since Jack’s funeral a year earlier.

The rest of that year was much smoother. Jessie still had some rebellion left, but it took the form of red hair dye and too dark eye makeup. Their relationship was rebuilt, stronger than before, having only each other. Hannah was sure basic training and officer’s school would eliminate that. 

Jessica was 22 now. She had finished Basic and Officer’s training early, and had gone on to “some school” as she had told her mother. Hannah couldn’t wait to find out what the big secret was. She had been gone for nearly 4 full years, they had catching up to do.

Jessica Shepard stepped off the shuttle with glaring red hair and dark eye makeup in stark contrast to her Alliance uniform. Hannah just shook her head as her daughter walked towards her, devil may care grin on her face as she practically tackled her mother in a bear hug.

“Mom! I missed you!” She squealed 

“I missed you too my girl...how are you? have you been eating? following orders? behaving?”

“Yes, mostly, and no comment” Grinned the younger Shepard.

Hannah looked over her daughter, noting that the red dye and makeup hadn’t changed, but there was a maturity there that hadn’t been before. She oozed confidence too. 

“So, what’s the big secret Kiddo?” Hannah asked.

Jessica pulled a pair of dogtags from her shirt and handed them to her mother. Hannah’s eyes lit up with a mixture of shock, pride, and tears as she saw the N6 designation beside her daughter’s name.

“N6!? Jessie how...when? Why didn’t you tell me??” 

“Remember when Anderson took me aside that day? He sat me down and told me stories about you and him, and dad. He told me how high your hopes were for me, and how hard losing Dad was for you. I was so selfish Mom, I only cared about my loss. I never considered yours. He helped me see that, and told me that he’d seen my entry test scores. He said if I could turn it around, see beyond myself, see the bigger picture, I’d be as good a leader as my parents. Then he told me if I was interested, and could do that...he’d see to it I got into N7 training. I just have to go into the combat phase...they’re sending me to Elysium.”

Hannah gasped “Oh dear...well we better make the most of the time we have. Elysium transports board in the morning. Let’s have some dinner and catch up.”

They made their way to the officer’s mess and sat down with their trays. 

“Mom, I swear if there weren’t fraternization regs” Shepard said, staring across the mess.

Hannah looked to wear her daughter was staring so intently. Across the room sat a young man, quietly eating and reading a datapad. 

“Jess!” Hannah chided with a smile.

“What? he’s beautiful....” Shepard continued staring. The young man was well built, clearly in great shape, with shining dark black hair and gorgeous whiskey brown eyes. 

“Do you think I could get him to go?” she asked a passing server.

“For the love of stars Jessica Jayne Shepard!” Hannah said, a bit louder than intended.

The young man looked over at the raised voice, catching Jessica’s eye and offering a friendly smile. Jess smiled back, and winked much to her mother’s chagrin.

“I can’t take you anywhere can I?” Hannah laughed. 

“For your information, the young man is Staff LT named Alenko. He’s awaiting his shuttle to his next assignment. No I don’t know where, I just know what I hear. Also, he’s an L2 Biotic I hear..” Hannah whispered with a grin

“Ohhh... an L2? Really...I’ve heard about them. Every story makes me more grateful I didn’t manifest before the L3 was approved. Well I guess since I can’t get him put in a doggie bag, we might as well have dessert. Who knows when I’ll get decent cake again when I hit Elysium. God I hate field rations.” Jessie grimaced.

They spent the rest of the evening catching up, promising each other to be careful and keep in touch. 

Hannah never expected what came after. A video message from Jess smiling from ear to ear in her new N7 armor, and her daughter’s image all over the news vids being awarded the Star of Terra. Hannah couldn’t have been prouder. Or so she thought. Until the message from Anderson arrived informing her that he was personally requesting Jess for his XO on his new ship. The Normandy.

And that they were putting Jess up for Council Spectre status. 

“You’ve come a long way kiddo” She said to the stars outside her quarters, as she packed for her next assignment. “Jack, I wish you could see her, you'd be so proud”.


	2. It's a Small Galaxy

“I am telling you, this is more than a simple shakedown Alenko” Joker commented for at least the third time that morning.

“Joker, come on you’re obsessing...again.” the young LT replied for at least the second time.

“How can you not see it? We have a full crew, a Spectre on board, and now this new XO” Joker insisted.

“So we have a new XO coming, that isn’t exactly out of the ordinary you know.” Sighed Kaidan.

“Not just ANY XO, Commander Shepard, hero of the Skyllian Blitz? First female N7? Hand Picked by Captain Anderson himself...look” Joker insisted, handing Kaidan a datapad.

“That’s crazy Jok...what the hell?” Kaidan’s eyes widened in shock staring at the image before him. 

“What’s that Kaidan? You starting to believe me?” Joker said, beginning to look victorious.

“No it’s not..I know her. Well, I have seen her...” Kaidan stammered.

“Sure, she’s been on a ton of vids, all over the media...” Joker started.

“No, I mean I have almost met her.” 

“How do you almost meet someone Alenko?” Joker laughed.

We were on the same carrier, waiting for transport. Well I was, she was having dinner with an older woman, her Mom I think. Anyhow she...well she winked at me.” Kaidan explained.

“Winked. you talked to her at least right? Tell me you didn’t just sit there grinning like an idiot Alenko, please!” Joker begged.

“Ok, I won’t tell you.” Kaidan replied as joker slapped a palm over his own face.

A commotion at the Normandy’s door broke the conversation. Captain Anderson was back, with Commander Shepard in tow. Anderson was escorting her through the Command Information Center, introducing her to the crew. They were heading back to the cockpit when Kaidan turned to stand, locking eyes with her. 

“Joker, Alenko, I’d like you to meet Commander Shepard, our new XO” the Captain said.

“Ma’am” Saluted Joker and Kaidan in unison.

At this point, Jess Shepard let out a snort trying to hold back her laughter. The three men all turned to look at her, Joker and Anderson looking confused, Kaidan looking more confused than either of them.

“I’m sorry it’s just...it’s nice to meet you Joker. And it’s about time we were formally introduced Alenko, Kaidan isn’t it?” She asked.

“You two have met before?” Inquired Anderson.

“Almost, sir” they replied in unison.

Joker was fully entertained by this exchange, and was having some trouble controlling himself.

“About 7 years ago, dinner with my Mom on the Trepidation” Shepard explained. She of course left out the part where she’d asked to order him as take-out.

“Yeah, sounds about right” Kaidan agreed

“Ok, then what’s so funny?” Anderson asked, befuddled.

“I’ll tell you later sir” she said as they turned to go to the crew quarters. But not before turning around to throw another wink at Kaidan.

“I give up on you Kaidan, seriously...good looking woman, clearly flirts with you TWICE and what do you do? You really need some shore leave.” Joker huffed, exasperated.

Kaidan remained standing right there.

Grinning like an idiot.


	3. Mama Bear

“Listen you pompous, cowardly, weasel faced buffoon you will tell me where my daughter is and you wll tell me NOW!” and angry voice was saying

“For the third time Mrs Shep...” Udina started

“That’s CAPTAIN Shepard to you, show some respect ambassador. And I heard your pathetic excuses the first three times, and I still cannot comprehend the utter stupidity it takes to lock down the ONE ship that can save your pathetic political asses!”

“This is none of your concern Captain” Udina sneered into the comm.

“None of my concern? NONE of MY Concern you say? Those are Alliance Marines on that ship, one of which is my daughter, exactly who do you think has the most concern in this situation you sanctimonious prick?”

“Captain Shepard I will not sit here and...what are you doing here...ooomph” uttered Udina before being knocked unconscious.

“Damn Hannah, I always though it was Jack that gave Shepard her temper...” Anderson chuckled as he fiddled with the computer.

“David? What are you doing there? What happened to Udina? Where’s Jessie??” Hannah fired in rapid succession.

“I’m helping her steal the Normandy, she’s on board waiting for the greenlight. You can call her up yourself in a few...there we go. I have to go” Anderson said, hanging up the comm.

Hannah Shepard sat staring at her comm-link in shock. She had to have heard that wrong. This had all started when she tried to contact Jess for an update. They’d both been so busy with their respective missions, they hadn’t talked since the incident with Zabaleta. She decided to give Jess some time to get safely away before she tried to make contact again. Besides, she had a dinner she couldn’t put off any longer.

 

* * *

 

As the Normandy escaped the Citadel, the crew all showed their support for Shepard. Each person she spoke to saying they trusted her, they were with her. It was more than she could have hoped for, and above and beyond what they’d signed up for. They were sacrificing everything by placing their faith in her, and she hoped she wouldn’t let them down.

Then there was Kaidan. Things had progressed much further than a wink and casual flirting. That was unexpected. But there are...or were regs. Well, maybe. Did they even matter anymore with her spectre status? Not that she could even be sure she had spectre status anymore. But what were fraternization regs compared to mutiny?

Her head was a mess by the time she reached her quarters. She finally flopped down at her computer and started the reports she’d need when they got to Ilos. She was quickly interrupted by Joker announcing that her mother was on the link in the comm room. At least this time he didn’t interrupt something potentially amazing. She still hadn’t forgiven that. The little shit had to have known otherwise why the “Sorry to interrupt”? She’d get even eventually.

She headed into the comm room, coffee in hand, and activated the link on her side, happy to see her Mom’s face on the other side of the screen. Happy and...shocked. Apparently while she was waiting she was...she was embracing someone. That someone had no shirt on. Well built, gravelly voiced someone. Wait, she knew that...

“Hello Jessie! I was worried about you! What’s going on where are you...why is your mouth open?” Hannah interrupted Jessie’s thoughts.

“Mother, were you just snogging Admiral Hackett??” Jessie asked

“Jessica Jayne, what kind of language is that to use...well, I guess...yes. We’ve been seeing each other.” Hannah admitted.

“Seeing? Mother I just saw the Admiral of the 5th fleet half NAKED! As if today hasn’t been traumatizing enough” Jessie wailed with a dramatic flair, teasing her mother without mercy. It took the edge off the tension at least.

“Oh for God’s sake Jessie...can we move on now?” an exasperated Hannah asked.

“Ok, ok, but he is in great shape for a man his age...but aren’t there regs? Hmmm?? Didn’t you tell me hands off Alenko when I joined the Normandy, because REGS??”

Shepard heard her mother sighing on the other end of the comm, and watched her run her hands through her hair in the manner that always meant exasperation.

“Jessica Jay...” Hannah started

“Ok, you already tri-named me once. So here’s the update. We had to steal the Normandy, Anderson helped. The Council grounded us, and locked her down when they refused to let me go to Ilos to stop Saren from accessing the Conduit, whatever that is. They don’t believe it exists, and they don’t believe reapers exist, even after I talked to the damned thing. So we’re in Mutiny, and I’m in love with My LT, and I’ve kidnapped my crew. That about sums it up!” Jessie rattled off.

“Oh hell kiddo, that’s rough. Well if it’s any help, the mutiny isn’t an issue. It’s YOUR ship, and YOUR crew, and they’re operating under command of a Spectre. Besides, Steven..I mean Admiral Hackett would have to press the issue, and he happens to believe you, so I don’t see that happening. Your crew could have debarked, and didn’t. They volunteered. And...in love are we?”

“Well, yeah. I tried not to be but...fuck. Sorry. He’s just...” Shepard stammered

“Beautiful? I believe that was what you called him back on the Trepidation” Hannah teased.

“Amazing. I mean he has my back, supports me, challenges me, he’s a hell of a soldier, friend, man...He’s sees me. Not ‘Commander Shepard, hero of the Blitz, first human spectre’. He sees Jessie, the woman, the human being under all the hype. I need that, but...Regs.” Jess sighed.

“Sweetie, you’re a spectre, that makes the regs a grey area to start with. If they even press the issue, which happens rarely. as long as you do your jobs, and don’t put your relationship ahead of the mission and crew, noone is going to care. Not even your Captain. You serve under Anderson, do your job, do it right, and he stays out of your business, trust me. Now, you get out there and stop that son of a bitch, and kick some ass. When you get back I want to meet this young man.” Hannah ordered.

“Yes Ma’am” Shepard gave her Mom a cocky salute “And thanks...I needed that. Oh and Mom? I’m happy for you.” She smiled.

“Thanks sweetie, good luck, and I love you”

“Love you too Mom”

When Kaidan showed up in her room later that night, he found her more relaxed than he’d seen her since arriving at the Citadel. They talked for a while, debating the regs, the wisdom of their choices, and where they were heading personally.

“Whatever happens, I’m proud to have served under you” He said, softly, edging closer.

“Kaidan, I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of you serving under me. Don’t you think it’s time to rectify that?” “ She shot back, closing the gap further.

“Ouch! Walked right into that didn’t I?” He chuckled, just before she took the initiative and kissed him.

They both hoped the trip to Ilos would take a few hours.


	4. High and Low

The entire crew of the Normandy was granted thirty days of shore leave after Sovereign and Saren were defeated at the Citadel. Most went their own way, excited at the prospect of time off, family visits, sweethearts to hide away with. Only three remained on board. Kaidan, Jess and Joker were heading to Hannah Shepard’s  apartments in the Presidium. They had decided she might need some help repairing damage, and cleaning up after the mess that was made. It isn’t every day a Reaper gets blown apart on The Citadel after all.  
  
When they arrived, Hannah embraced her daughter forcefully. So much worry erased in such a simple gesture. Seeing one’s child whole and healthy after such a fierce battle was a miracle. She released Shepard, and to everyone’s surprise hugged Alenko and Joker just as strongly. She would have hugged the whole squad had they been there. But Garrus wanted to visit his father, Tali the fleet, and who knows where Wrex went. Liara had sent her regrets, but she needed some time alone, to finally cope with her Mother’s death. These people, and to her that’s what they were, all of them, had a hand in keeping her daughter safe under fire. She owed them a debt.  
  
Jess looked around the condo, left relatively untouched in the attack. She smiled at the childhood pictures of her and her parents, and the newly added photo of a certain gruff admiral.  
  
“Mom! You cooked!” Shepard exclaimed with a smile as she saw the spread in the dining area.  
  
“Well you didn’t expect me to let you starve did you? Can’t have a pair of biotics visit without appropriate nutrition now can I?” Hannah said, slightly indignant at the surprise in Jessie’s voice.  
  
Kaidan followed Shepard’s voice, seeing tables covered with snacks, cookies, pie, and...was that steak and eggs he smelled coming from the kitchen?  
  
Shepard was reaching for a cookie as Hannah joined them, smacking her child’s hand. “Those are for Joker young lady!” She chided.  
  
“What? Why does Joker get special cookies? I just saved the Citadel!” Shepard feigned hurt feelings and an impressive pout.  
  
“And I saved YOUR ass how many times along the way? Best helmsman in the fleet remember?” Joker grinned.  
  
“That’s right, plus...not a bad little secret agent. How do you think I kept up to date during that battle? And slightly before” She chuckled.  
  
“You WERE spying on us weren’t you?” She threw a cookie at Joker, who ducked amazingly well considering his condition.  
  
“Not at all, Commander ma’am” he grinned with a very fake salute.  
“You’re lucky I love you two” Shepard said, shaking her head. Joker was like having that pesky younger brother she’d always wanted.  
  
“What’s that make me exactly?” Kaidan teased, draping an arm of her shoulder.  
  
“Incredibly lucky, LT” She said, smiling up at him.  
  
“Oh get a ROOM you two” groaned Joker.  
  
They sat down to eat, enjoying the time before the next mission. The next month was spent at Hannah’s condo, with everyone enjoying just being themselves. Joker tortured them with Blasto movies, Hannah beat everyone but Kaidan at cards, and Jess hid behind a pillow as her childhood picture were pulled out and shared, without her consent.  It was a month of heaven, and they were all sorry to see it end.  
  
After goodbyes were said, they went back to the ship, getting things ready to depart. The crew trickled back in slowly looking refreshed and happy. Wrex of course entered grumbling, but even he looked happy.  
  
“Ok guys, we have our orders. Lame orders in my opinion. We are to search out these reports of...Geth. Apparently a few ships have disappeared.  
  
“What? GETH?? after realizing Reapers do exist, and are a threat, they’re sending us after GETH?” Pressley argued.  
  
“I’m not happy either but there it is. Secure cargo, and stations, we’re leaving in one hour.  


* * *

  
  
Shepard looked up as Kaidan entered her quarters, and smiled at her nightly intruder.  
  
“Isn’t it past lights out LT? I might have to write you up” she grinned wickedly.  
  
“mmmhmmm...and how could I get out of that... _ma’am_ ” he replied nuzzling her neck, just below the ear.  
  
“Oh, I could think of a few...What the hell!” She yelped as the Normandy pitched sideways, throwing her on the floor.  
  
Suddenly alarms were sounding, and her and Kaidan were grabbing armor and fire extinguishers. Something hit the ship, something big. Debris was falling, the ship was rocking side to side under their feet. She was fighting with the sprinkler controls when Kaidan came running back from the cockpit where Joker was sounding the Mayday.  
“Do you think the Alliance will get here in time?” He asked  
  
“I hope so...” She replied grabbing her fire extinguisher again as more small fires erupted.  
  
“Kaidan, get the crew into the pods” She ordered  
  
“Joker won’t abandon ship, and I’m not going either”  
  
“Kaidan, I need you to get the crew out of here...there’s no time to argue, just go. Please” She said urgently.  
  
“Ok, but Shepard..I...” He started  
  
“Me too...now GO!” she yelled back, as she headed to drag Joker out.  
  
It took some convincing, a lot of t, to get Joker into that escape pod. But he was safe, and she was seconds away from joining him. Suddenly another hit blew her through a hole in the fuselage. All she could do was hit the button to get Joker safely off and away, as the last blast she’d see tossed her into space. Everything fell away. All sound ceased, except her own breathing. It was almost peaceful. Until she couldn’t breathe. Straining to repair the hoses in her suit, she succumbed to unconsciousness, falling helplessly into whatever world was below.  
  
Those closest to Shepard found themselves seated around Hannah Shepard’s quarters on the Citadel. Once again there was food, and childhood pictures were brought out, along with vids and images from the Normandy that Tali had managed to save to her Omnitool before evacuating. The only thing missing was her. That was a wound that only time could heal. For some, that wound would remain open longer.


	5. Chapter 5

Jess Shepard paced her quarters, frustration and anger in every stride. Her mother watched from the vid screen, helpless to do anything to actually help her daughter, but listen. it was mind blowing to her to hear the whirlwind that had been Jess’s return from death. She’d had no time to stop and absorb everything that had taken place, and she could see that finally wearing on her child. The meeting with Kaidan on Horizon seemed to bring it all to the forefront.  
  
“One thing, Mom. Just ONE thing I wanted for me. You know I love you, and our life growing up. But all that time I had to live knowing my friends would never stay, that home would never be one place. It was always “home is where the mission sends us” and that was ok. I understood. Then I go and enlist, and it’s mission first, all the time. No time for friends, no time for love, no time for me. I accepted it. I did. But then I met him and it all changed. God Mom, it was so...GOOD. I thought...I thought he’d be glad I was back, I thought he’d let me explain...I thought...I thought we were...better. Guess I’m too old for fairy tales.” Shepard sighed.  
  
“Sweetie, you have to understand his point of view...put yourself in his shoes for a moment” Hannah advised  
  
“I have Ma, I really have. And I know why he reacted to Cerberus that way. Hell I reacted that way. I called TIM a terrorist to his holographic face! It’s just...I’m still frustrated. Here I am, running around trying to save the galaxy from yet another threat that no one believes exists, my crew needs me to help with their issues, Hackett needs me to help him, and the one person that cared about ME and what I needed, walked away. And he apologized, but...I can see him leaving his “way out”.  I need to just accept it's over I guess. This mission is too dangerous, too important for me to fuck up over my heart right?”  
  
“Language young lady!” Hannah chuckled “Maybe when it’s over, and you come back you two can talk?”  
  
“Mom, now you sound like him. Maybe. But I need to let him move on. We don’t know if I’ll come back. Maybe we both need to just...move on”   
  
“You may be right. But don’t count out the possibility kiddo. There’s always hope. And by the stars you damned well will come back...you died once, that was quite enough young lady!” The elder Shepard demanded.  
  
“Yes Ma’am” Jess saluted with a grin. “Thanks Mom.   
  
“Jessie? At least answer his message ok?” Hannah asked.  
  
“Yes ma’am...Shepard out”  
  
Jess pulled up the message. She didn’t need to read it again, she could remember it by heart. Her mom was right, he at least deserved a reply.

  
_Kaidan,_  
  
 _I got your message, and I appreciate the apology. Consider it accepted. I’m not angry about how you reacted. Not really. I wouldn’t have expected you to do anything but stand firm in your beliefs, you wouldn’t be you any other way. I just...some of those words hurt like “traitor” and “woman I loved” and it’s just that you didn’t give me a chance to explain. I did try to get in touch. My messages were all returned. Probably The Illusive Man interfering. Horizon was his little setup...to “put my personal issues in the past”, I put nothing past that freaky eyed pyjack._  
  
 _Believe me, I understand being repulsed by Cerberus. I don’t trust them any more than you do, not as a whole. But my crew? Them I do trust. You didn’t meet Miranda, but she headed the project that brought me back. She....isn’t what I expected from a Cerberus Operative. She saved my life Kaidan, they saved me, them and Liara...the Shadow Broker wanted my body to sell to the collectors, Cerberus helped LIara rescue me, well what there was of me. According to Jacob that would be “Meat and tubes”. Gross. . I never had a choice, and apparently “stay dead” wasn’t an option. So here I am. These attacks have to be stopped, and if that means using Cerberus resources, and intel, then that’s what I’ll do. We both know who’s behind The Collectors._  
  
 _As for Ilos...of course I remember, and don’t you dare doubt that meant as much to me as it did you. I thought we’d have the fairy tale...but, well you know. I guess we’re too old for those stories now. I hope you find peace Kaidan, and happiness. And I hope, if and when I return from this mission...we can talk. As friends._  
  
 _Always,_  
 _JJ_  
  
As she hit the send command, Jess breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe it was good to let go.


	6. Doctor's Orders

_Jess Shepard sat on her couch, reading one of a handful of datapads with mission reports yet to be filed. This was always the worst part. There was always a fine line between what The Illusive Man needed to know, and what Shepard needed him not to know, but she liked to think she was getting pretty good at walking it. At the moment she was making a list of crew personal issues and favors that needed to be resolved. Jacob’s message from a father he thought dead, Samara’s daughter needing found and handled, Jack needing to blow up her past. Planning the missions was always the easy part. Dealing with the aftermath was the hard part. It took Garrus a week to speak to her again after she stopped him from killing Sidonis. On the other hand, Grunt had been quite content since completing his Rite of Passage and joining Clan Urdnot. Of course a happy Grunt meant a hungry Grunt, so she had to watch her fish tank closely._  
  
 _As she finished up the last of the plans, she heard a knock at the door. She called for the visitor to enter while she put away her mess.  When she turned around, Thane was patiently waiting,  admiring the fish she had acquired in her fish tank._  
  
 _"surprised they haven't died are you? " she quipped,  arms folded across her chest and a smirk curving her lips._  
  
 _"I'm more surprised Grunt hasn't eaten them yet.  You should lock the door"  Thane chuckled in reply._  
  
 _"So,  what's up?  Everything ok?" she asked,  a note of concern in her voice._  
  
 _"I'm fine Shepard.  I actually came as a favor to Dr.  Chakwas.  She would like to see you for a moment. " he replied._  
  
 _" she could have just called... Why send you?  She wants to give me a shot doesn't she?? " Jessie asked with sincere alarm._  
  
 _Thane laughed,  unable to reconcile this fearless warrior on the battlefields with a fear of needles._  
  
 _“It’s a simple exam, Siha. She’s concerned that your scars aren’t healing. I am to help you...relax.” hoping to reduce her fear._  
  
 _“Relax hmmm? Oh I can relax just fine...come here” Jess answered, taking Thane’s hands and leading him toward her never made bed._  
  
 _“Shepard, I don’t think this is what Dr Chakwas had in mind” He chuckled, willingly following._  
  
 _“Shhh...just wait, you’ll see” She grinned, dimming the lights and turning on the music._  
  
 _She pulled Thane onto the bed with her, snuggling into his shoulder as they lay back on the cushions_  
 _._  
 _“Now, look up” She said._  
  
 _Thane looked above, admiring the stars through the skylight of the cabin. Cerberus spared no expense on Shepard’s quarters it was obvious. The fish tanks, skylight, bed, even the bedding was built for comfort. They stayed there, in comfortable silence, long enough for Thane to realize his arm was losing circulation. He was contemplating what to do with the situation, when the door hissed open and Dr chakwas entered._  
  
 _“Shhh” he said, pointing to the sleeping commander on his shoulder._  
  
 _Chakwas smiled and nodded, leaving the way she came._  
  
It seemed so long ago now. And yet here Jess stood, back in Dr Chakwas med bay, having her cybernetics scanned. The doctor clucked her tongue and sighed at the condition of Shepard’s skin. She wanted to lecture her to relax, but she knew the commander couldn’t. Not now. Not with the Reapers attacking, not with having almost lost Kaidan twice. Once by a Cerberus mech, and again when they faced each other on the Citadel. Not when She had just watched the man she loved sacrifice himself against an assassin meant for the Council and Shepard. Certainly not while she was caught between mourning Thane and trying to keep her feelings for Alenko buried even if Jess would never openly say so. The Doctor knew her Commander inside and out,  all she could do was advise, try to think positively...that was the best she could do.  



End file.
